In the News: Shit You Should Know

Hi and welcome back to Shit You Should Know. My phone and computer have entered into a conspiracy against me getting anything done today. Is there a more futile experience than yelling at an inanimate object? At least my dog has the good sense to act guilty when he ignores my demands. RIP, Wednesday. Death by frozen Apple electronics.

Let us bravely attempt to carry on…

The Academy Awards are Sunday night, and Leonardo DiCaprio is a heavy favorite to take home the trophy for Best Actor. I think I speak for all of us when I say, dear God, let him win just to rid our Instagram feeds of sad Leo memes once and for all. If nothing else, an Oscar will help him finally land a hot girlfriend.

I swear I have good taste in movies, but my friends don’t. (JK, girls! All six of the Step It Up movies are soooo good.) Because of this I haven’t seen a single movie nominated this year. If you’re like me, here’s a guide to catching them before Sunday’s show. All you have to do is stop sleeping and dedicate the next three days of your life to purchasing and watching each 3-hour-long nominee, because the longer the movie the more likely it is to be nominated for an Oscar.

What follows is the tragic story of a hapless, unemployed girl and a $250,000 donation from an unlikely source. Kesha has been engaged in a prolonged contract dispute with her producer, Dr. Luke, who she claims sexually and emotionally abused her. As the suit TIK-TOKs forward (sorry), Kesha faces mounting legal bills and an inability to work. Luckily for Kesha, Taylor Swift—patron saint of female pop stars—has stepped in with significant financial support. NOT ALL HEROES WEAR CAPES. Joking aside, while the truth of Kesha’s claims against Dr. Luke remains unclear, being forced to work with your (alleged) abuser is terrible.

All the single ladies, all the single ladies… are voting for Bernie Sanders. And they are doing so regardless of race or socioeconomic status. While this may seem surprising since there is a female candidate running (Hillary Clinton, which is on the short list of shit you should definitely know), single women tend to lean further left due to issues like income equality, maternity leave, and reproductive rights. The entire linked article is worth reading, but this quote in particular stuck out:

For the first time in history, a majority of women voters are projected to be unmarried, but going into the previous presidential-election season, nearly 40 percent of them had not registered to vote.

So ladies, register to vote and wield your power, no matter who you’re voting for.

What I love this week: New research suggests that couples who have sex at least 1-2 times per week are up to 30% happier than those who don’t. Duh, right? But what is interesting is that men value mood setting, sexual variety, then communication as top predictors of sexual satisfaction. On the other hand, women rank orgasms first. Guys, do you feel like you can’t ever make your girlfriend happy? Well, here you go. Try harder.

See you next week.


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